February 2011
24 posts
“Thanks for making your menu an automatic download of a PDF. I treasure the...”
– The Tooth Fairy
“Thanks for letting me know that I could have saved a dollar by printing your...”
– Someone who hates saving money.
“It is so cool that your online drinks menu simulates the experience of flipping...”
“Oh, you’ve called your pasta section “pastabilities?”...”
“I’m still waiting with baited breath for you to answer the email I sent to...”
– the guy who still can’t find your menu online
“This website is immensely helpful because they split every category of their...”
“I want this music to play forever.”
– Not I
“I came here for something other than your menu.”
– No one
“Yay! The link keeps *bouncing*! I love that trying to enter your website is a...”
“Thank you for making your site entirely in Flash so that you make it clear as...”
“It seems like someone at some point thought about why a person would visit this...”
– Absence of personhood
“I’m sure at least one person has watched this website intro.”
– Absolute zero
“Yes, I would love to call you to find out if my apartment is within your...”
“Good to know that your site is still under construction. I’m also glad you...”
– nobody I can even imagine
“Really, it no problem at all for me to email you for your current menu....”
“Man, I really enjoy being forced to load up Adobe Acrobat to read this...”
“It’s really helpful that you put every preparation style in quotation...”
“I was wondering if this place had an atmosphere of murmuring patrons and...”
“I love the animated “coming soon!” construction worker on the...”
“I really do enjoy having to find that cool scroll-bar you built into your Flash...”
“Sure! I’d love to make a reservation for the expensive Valentine’s...”
“I love clicking on your “Events” and “Specials” button...”
“The website says it’s best viewed with Internet Explorer 4.0. It already...”
– The nonexistent customer
“I love it when you don’t list that your delivery hours are different than...”
